Can you believe that time of year has arrived already?! 

Time for my annual birthday retrospective!

I’m sitting in my bed, in the same exact spot I’ve written my last two retrospectives and there’s something extremely comforting about that to me. I’m wearing pajamas just like last year, but this year I’m wearing a charcoal mask on my face, trying to get my skin to stop freaking out. Glam.

More than any other birthday in the past I’m excited for 25. I’m not sure exactly why, mostly it just sounds fabulous to me. Me? I’m 25. Twenty Five. It feels like possibility and a fresh start and a new chapter. MID TO LATE TWENTIES YA’LL HERE I COME! 

You can find my previous birthday retrospectives here:

Twenty Two

Twenty Three

Twenty Four

And now, without further ado: Twenty Five Things I’ve Learned This Past Year.

1.  If you ever need to get blood out of your light grey comforter, immediate OxyClean attention and then a trip in the washing machine on cold (warm or hot water “cooks” the blood into the fibers of the fabric/ ew.) will make it appear like it never happened. (also, don’t ask.)

2. If you don’t ask for your money back when you have an unsatisfactory experience, you won’t ever get it back. But if you ask the chances of it happening are much higher. I say this because my inclination is never to ask based on my perception that they’ll say no. They can’t say no unless you ask. 

3. Poverty is no joke. I’m just really beginning to understand how awful and seemingly unchanging the cycle of poverty is in this country. Don’t even get me started.

4You can make your own biore pore strips with milk and gelatin, but its actually really gross and you could save yourself the drama by buying them at CVS: 

5. True love manifests itself in so many ways every day, if you just pay attention. 

6. “Nothing gold can stay.” Is true. I spend a lot of time chasing the ghost of previous good things. 

7. Put an effort into your friendships. Plan ladies nights!

8. I hold on to a hell of a grudge if you cross me though

9. I can finally accept that new years eve parties are almost always let downs. No matter how much you want that party to be the best party ever it is always crap. Just stay in and eat a delicious dinner and watch the ball drop. Lower the expectations and just kiss ya boo at midnight. 

10. I love butternut squash.

11. You can apply liquid makeup with a foundation brush instead of those putrid sponge things.

12. In the game of Monopoly, if you land on a property and elect not to buy it goes into auction until another player buys it. If you play this way the game doesn’t last a million hours and nobody wants to quit (in general.)

13. A  food processor is one of the best kitchen appliances a latke maker could dream of.

14. On a related note, Christmas is AWESOME.

15. Skateboard equipment isn’t that hard to build if you have an awesome Dad with carpentry skills. 

16. Writing cover letters is the most necessary and soul sucking evil you’ll probably ever experience. 

17. It is what it is Santa. 

18. I love rose gold. 

19. Despite many years my brain can still recite almost every song I listened to in high school. 

20. Eventually, your peers start having babies on purpose, and it is bizarre. 

21. Graduate school might be hellish, but nothing feels better than when you finally graduate. 

22. Knowing you’ve found the right profession is helpful too. 

23.  You can have a disagreement in a relationship and it isn’t the end of the world. 

24. At bridal showers, the maid of honor is expected to collect ribbon with which to make a ribbon bouquet for the wedding rehearsal. I am bad at this task and according to my grandmother Jews don’t have bridal showers or wedding rehearsals. “What? Ya just show up. Whats tah rehearse? A dinnah for the rehearsal? No.” 

25.  Say what you think, love who you love, cause you just get so many trips ’round the sun.